Thursday, January 23, 2014
BERNICE GOT US IN BIG BIG TROUBLE
So who would you believe if a catastrophe happened in your kitchen. HERS or US??? I, Angus McConnell swear to tell the whole truf and nuffin but the whole truf!!!
Mom came home from work last night and when hers walked in our kitchen her noticed torn up paper all overs the floor along with various items from the trash can, our blankies all thrown around the floor, and stuffies wif their heads torn off.
Oh hers was so mad steam was rolling out of her ears and mouth. We ran into the livingroom for various safety reasons, and tried to make ourselves invisible. I kept yelling IT WAS BERNICE and our Mom was a roaring so loud hers couldn't even hear me!!! We were afeared hers would refuse to feed us our supper and we would haf to wait until Dad got home late at night and beg from him.
Finally Mom calmed down and I slunk out of the foxhole. I calmly explained to her that BERNICE came into the kitchen after hers went to work. Hers started to throw our blankies all around teasing us wif them. I told her, "BERNICE you nevers ever tease a pug about his blankie cos we loves them almost as much as sausage gravy!" Hers just pushed me aside. Then hers opened hers mouth real big ...so big you could see Niagara Falls in there and hers blew the picture off the refrig. THEN BERNICE GRABBED IT AWAY FROM ME and TORE IT ALL UP! I looked up at MOm wif my big brown eyes, and hers could see right away I was telling hers the truf.
So OUR mom stomped into the kitchen and grabbed hold of meanoldBERNICE and threw her right on her big a** (sorry for the HBO words but isa mad) out the door. You do know folks that we had -35 below last night so this morning Mom just propped FROZEN BERNICE against the trash can outside for the trashman to pick up.
The three of us was watching this morning when the big truck picked up BERNICE and now her is on her way to the landfill and wesa are back in our Moms good graces.
Fanks for listening to our story and believing us.
Angus McConnell Long